YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
