I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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