I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
