he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize