oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
