he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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