hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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