ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Someone shattered a urinal.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize