What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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