i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
