DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
