this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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