yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
