she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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