At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
