Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
