Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Randomize
