This girl is more easily done than said...
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
You left your phone here
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