"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
