i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
where am i from again
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Randomize
