well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize