So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize