You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
