you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
