sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
