you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Randomize
