did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
did you just send me my own nude
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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