Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Randomize