Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
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