Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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