just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize