Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I love you. Go after that dick
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
