Yo dont text me then not text me
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
