I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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