I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
