My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
