so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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