I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
