He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize