No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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