Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
