just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
