sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
