nut hugger
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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