In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
