Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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