i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
