i think my mom watched the whole time
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
