She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize