Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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